I thought that the things I loved
were places I could always go back to
but the spaces between things become places themselves
and threaten to swallow me whole.
I thought that knowing in just the right way
would be enough to free me from pain.
For those of us who drowned,
and continue living underwater,
this isn’t heaven
but I hope we could come at last to love it.
Gregory Kan is a writer and coder based in Wellington. His poetry has been featured in literary journals such as the Atlanta Review, Cordite, Jacket, Landfall, The New Zealand Listener, SPORT and Best New Zealand Poems. His poetry and essay works have also featured for contemporary art institutions such as the Auckland Art Gallery, Artspace, the Adam Art Gallery, the Dunedin Public Art Gallery, Enjoy Gallery, Te Tuhi Centre for the Arts, and the Physics Room. Auckland University Press published his first book, This Paper Boat, in 2016. This Paper Boat was shortlisted for the Kathleen Grattan Poetry Prize in 2013 and for the New Zealand Book Awards for Best Poetry in 2017. He was a Grimshaw-Sargeson Fellow in 2017. His second poetry collection, Under Glass, was published by Auckland University Press in March, 2019. Under Glass was longlisted for the New Zealand Book Awards for Best Poetry for 2019.